Navigating Motherhood Without Your Mother
Are you navigating the wild ride of motherhood without the support of your mother? When your mom is absent due to estrangement, illness, distance, or loss, the journey of motherhood can feel especially heavy and heart-wrenching.
Navigating Motherhood Without Your Mother is the go-to podcast for moms who lack maternal support and desire to make peace with the past, build confidence in their present role, and break harmful generational patterns for the future. This show empowers moms to achieve lasting results, such as improved emotional regulation, breaking cycles of dysfunction, and fostering a healthy family environment.
Alyssa Carlene, your host, is a dedicated mom on a mission. With emotional depth and passion drawn from her transformative journey, she proves that the absence of a motherly figure can make you stronger—and that you don't have to face this path alone. Through her 5-step ROOTS framework, listeners will learn to Recognize harmful patterns, Own their stories, Open their hearts to forgiveness, Transform limiting beliefs, and Set new boundaries.
If you've been asking questions like:
- How can I make peace with the past and be the best parent for my children?
- How can I build confidence in my present role as a mother?
- What can I do to break unhealthy and harmful generational cycles?
- How do I set healthy boundaries with my mother and/or other family members?
- What are ways I can foster emotional resilience?
- Where can I find support navigating motherhood without my mom?
- What are the potential root causes of my chronic pain and mental health struggles?
- How can I create a healthier and stable home environment for my family?
- What are some alternative methods for overcoming the wounds of my past?
- How do I stop people pleasing so I can better care for my needs?
- How can I open my heart to forgiveness to move forward and continue healing myself?
Are you ready to transform yourself and cultivate the loving home you’ve always dreamed of and deserve? Then this show is for you!
Navigating Motherhood Without Your Mother
16. Four Practices to Shut Down Negative Thoughts
As a mom, do you ever feel like negative thoughts have taken over your headspace?
In this quick episode, Alyssa Carlene shares four simple, real-life practices to help you shut down that inner critic and bring your mindset back to center—because motherhood is hard enough without your brain working against you. These bite-sized mindset shifts are perfect for busy moms who need a reset in five minutes or less.
Listen to the episode to answer the following questions:
- Why do I keep thinking the worst about myself as a mom?
- How can I stop spiraling when negative thoughts take over?
- What can I do in the moment to quiet my inner critic?
- Are there quick mindset tools I can use even on busy days?
- How do I separate my thoughts from the truth?
- Can I change the way I talk to myself?
1. Want to join a supportive, heartfelt community with other moms who are also navigating motherhood without their mothers? Join our Facebook Group today!
2. Are you ready to build confidence and emotional resilience as a mom, even without the support of your mother? Access the free video training now: Five Steps to Navigating Motherhood Without Your Mother!
3. Want to chat more about what it's like to mother without your mom and get personalized support? Send Alyssa Carlene a DM on Instagram!
Lately, it feels like negative thoughts have been racing and running my mind. Sure, I could blame sleep deprivation, anxiety, depression, trauma, all the hustle and bustle and chaos of motherhood. But at the end of the day, I'm the one in charge and I'm the one that needs to make a change. To be honest, today's episode is something I really need. It's a way to motivate myself to curb these negative thoughts and stop living in such a drama dynamic. And I want to help you because we're in this together, mama. I don't know anyone who doesn't struggle with negative thinking. If your brain's been feeding you junk thoughts today, I'm talking thoughts like I'm messing everything up. I'm not good enough. I'm failing my kids. Stick around. I've got some awesome practices that will transform your life. You're listening to Navigating Motherhood Without Your Mother. Here, we help moms with young children who lack support from their mothers to make peace with the past, build confidence in their present role, and break harmful generational patterns for the future through the five-step Roots Framework. My name is Alyssa Carlene. I am a motherhood empowerment and generational healing coach. My mission is to help you discover the root causes of your struggles so you can foster emotional resilience and create a healthy, loving home environment for your family. Please remember that my podcast content is for educational purposes only and should never replace proper medical and mental health guidance from licensed professionals. Let's get started. Okay, today, four practices that are going to help you kick these negative thoughts to the curb. I love it. This is going to be just a simple, bite-sized, quick episode for you to listen to and come back to when you are feeling like that stuck, sticky, negative, foggy, that place in your mind that just feels so empty. And I'll be completely honest and transparent. I've been feeling that way. And I'm really trying to kick it because ultimately it becomes a habit. So number one, the first practice is to call out the thought. Let's be real. Sometimes our inner critic is louder than our toddler with a tambourine. But here's the truth. Just because you think it doesn't mean that it's true. Here's an example of a thought. I am failing as a mother. Not only is that a horrible negative thought, but that is also, it could be a limited belief. I'm going to have an episode all about transforming limited beliefs, but today we're going to think of it as a negative thought. So if you think the thought, I'm failing as a mother, pause for a second when that thought comes in and call it out. That is not a true thought. You are not failing as a mother. Number two, that first practice is call out the thought. The second practice comes right along with it. Give it a nickname. I love this, okay? When you catch a negative thought, try naming it. I'm going to start doing this. I've been thinking of what I can call my thoughts, and I'm going to call it frantic lists. My nickname is Liss or Lissy. Maybe I'll call it Frantic Lissy. You could call it Doom Debbie or, you know, make it rhyme with your own name. I like to keep it as my own name, even a nickname, because it feels like it's a part of me, even though it's not. And I can just say, yeah, this was my thought, but it doesn't mean that it's true. So if I call it Frantic Liss, then I can say, OK, thanks, Frantic Liss. But yeah, I'm not interested. in that today. I'm not interested in that sort of thinking. Naming your inner critic helps separate it from you. Far more often than not, we take all these things and we really internalize it. And then we start to think and believe in these negative thoughts. Okay. So number three is to replace it with a kinder truth. Negative thoughts love drama. Replace them with something that's honest but kind. Not sugar-coated, not a lie, just grounded. Okay, so negative, I'm failing. Kinder truth, I'm overwhelmed, not failing, and I can ask for help. See how that becomes a way that you can tell this inner critic that, no, you're wrong. and acknowledge the truth and acknowledge that, yeah, maybe you feel like you're failing for a plethora of reasons because mom guilt and because all the things. I've had that thought because my five-year-old does not like to eat vegetables and she barely eats many fruits. And so often I feel like I'm failing. I'm failing to provide her nutrition. I've allowed this to go on for so long, blah, blah, blah. Those thoughts are not helpful. They're only hurtful, okay? So it's really tuning into yourself, catching it, naming it. I'm going to do this. I'm literally going to tell Frantic Lissy to get out, right? To just GTFO, sorry. But I mean, it's like, come on, we don't need this as moms, right? And it's important that we keep at it because I think that we can get so caught up in the negative thinking and the rumination and then everything on top of it, the overwhelm, the sleep deprivation, the tending to everyone's needs, being the default parent, whatever, it can make it feel worse. But if you pause and just do these quick things, I really do believe that we can change these habits. And I'm right here with you. I'm telling you, like, this is something I have to do. This is something I have to start practicing. And then the fourth, the fourth practice is move your body. Negative thoughts lose power when you get out of your head and into your body. It doesn't have to be a full-on cardio workout or strength training. You know, do what works best for you. Go for a walk, stretch, dance in your kitchen. You don't need something elaborate, even just a few seconds of movement because you're moving that energy. You're moving it, you're shifting it, you're changing the vibration, and you are transforming. Please remember, you are doing hard, sacred work in inner work, working on yourself, transforming your life, teaching your children how making peace with the past, right? And you are building confidence in yourself and breaking toxic patterns for the future. This is holy work. This is incredible work. You are not your worst moment. You are not your worst thought. you are allowed to be both struggling and strong. Two things can exist at once. This has been probably one of the biggest lessons I have learned in becoming a mother is the dichotomy or the contradictions of motherhood. I can feel so joyous and happy with my children and also so annoyed and I want to be alone and I want, you know, it's crazy. So just remember that. Let's really, really quick refresh. First practice is call out the thought. Second, give it a nickname. Third, replace it with a kinder truth. And fourth, move your body. You are doing amazing. I'm so happy that you've listened. And I hope that you will connect with me on Instagram at alissa.carleen.rogers. I want to hear what you are naming your inner critic. Connect with me there. Send me a DM. I'm so excited. I look forward to meeting with you. You are an incredible mom. Don't forget it. Until next time, thanks for listening.